GOD'S GIFT OF LOVE

Mothers actually invented multitasking long before this competency came up in the world of computer engineering. When God created woman He knows that she will need amazing power to comply with her calling when she builds her own home. A mother never existed until her children were born. Although evolution failed to transform her for more pairs of hands and she may not be as explicit as most automated appliance in our household, God gave her all the essential requirements she needs to perform her duty as a mother. She has a strength that can hold children on her lap at one time; eyes to see through it that her children are safe; smile and kisses that can mend anything; intelligence so she can reason and conciliate to stand up for iniquity and discrimination; tear to express happiness and loneliness when someone succeeds or fails. A mother has a pure heart so she can love unconditionally. Because most mothers stay at home, fathers delegated their authority and the responsibility to discipline rests on their shoulders. This makes them more certain when it comes to administration of corrections. Our mother may scold us for something, denies our happiness and pleasures or hurt our feelings it is because mothers know what is best for us. A mother always has to think many times before making the right decisions for her children. The art of bringing up is very much part of a mother’s love and concern for our lives. When a mother disciplines her children she is not despising them but their act of disobedience and misbehavior. Although very difficult and painful, a mother will always be ready to agonize the pain of her children's intense animosity, disrespects, and rebellious nature and will hold unshakably to her responsibility and will kiss the offense goodbye into everlasting mercy and forgiveness. When God gave us our mothers He sent out somebody to help us carry our afflictions and adversities, to teach us the power of encouragement and determination, to console us and alleviate every pain and failures and to initiate our future so we can attain our triumphs. Sometimes a mother seems importunate because she persistently remembers the things we should do, she asks too many questions though she already knows and at times we branded her killjoy to our own gratifications and happiness. Have we realized that being a mother is the toughest job a person can have? It’s a job that requires a lot of sacrifice, sufferings, trials, strengths, kindness and understanding. It’s an assignment that denies a person her right to demand, to rest, to complain, to surrender. It’s a calling that never seems to get easier in spite of all those years of experience with no respite, no delay, no day off even for sickness and recovery. She will not desert you. Some fathers may turn his back on his family, relatives become incorrigible nemesis, husbands may abandon their wives and vice versa but a mother's love lasts through all. She is the truest friend we can have and she will never forsake us even when friends who revel with us in our sunshine desert us. She will cling to us no matter what happens for better or for worst. My personal perception of our present generation of young people today is the lost of conscience and sense of moral caring for the mother. The realization of the truth that no one else in the world can ever take her place. That a mother is worth a hundred schoolmasters because she can show us the way to learn about strengths that we didn't know we had, and dealing with inferiorities so that we can see optimism and confidence in life. She will always be the guardian angel of the family so she can lead each of us to compassion, morality and paradigms. The most resilient and enduring rock, a warrior and a survivor. A mother is not just creation of the divine mystery of reproduction. She is God’s gift of love to us.

FOLLOWING THE AMISH FOOTSTEPS

Watching movies is one of the ways I invest my day offs with my kids. It is becoming a custom after lunch or dinner the family gather together in the living room to watch TV or movie; somehow this habit provides a sort of bonding moment for the whole family. Last week we watched Harrison Ford’s Witness. This is a 1985 American spine-chiller film about a young Amish widow(Kelly McGillis), and her 8-year-old son (Lukas Haas) who inadvertently sees two men atrociously murder a third. This film limelight on a detective (Ford) protecting this young Amish boy who becomes the target of a brutal murderer after he witnesses the killing ,a slashing in the restroom in Philadelphia train station while on their way to visit her aunt. The movie did well at the box office earn eight Academy Award nominations. It depicts a thrilling and heartbreaking love story and choices we make in life and the choices that other people make for us. One thing that really struck my attentiveness is how the movie describes the Amish people. Truthfully speaking, that was the first time I chance upon such a word and I don’t have even the slightest hint which people the word refers to. Puzzled and interested, I googled the word for enlightenment. The Amish are group of Christian church fellowships that began in Switzerland. The Amish are known for simple living, plain dress, and disinclination to embrace many conveniences of modern technology. Amish people are clean living people who value rural life, manual labor and modesty. These people have heavy emphasis on neighbor and family relationships. They believe that being friendly with neighbors and relatives are the greatest roles of the family. The movie describes Amish as anti-individualist. They readiness to submit to their belief is asserted through collective standards and modern innovations can only trigger less reliance on community and will advocate contention and personal egotism. Despite all the times that has passed and the many transformations that have taken place in our humankind these people manage to detach themselves from the things of the world. They believe that materialism can not keep them from being close to God, and can bring up notorieties that could be devastating to their communities and to their way of life. This movie brings me to a question wondering how these people can survive in their supposedly backward ways well in fact, now days everything is about material things. We all live in a dynamic materialistic world imbued by wants. While Amish do not own or operate automobiles, limit electricity, telephones, TV and radios in their homes or even restrict taking photographs we pamper ourselves getting luxurious cars, getting the latest phones, living in the best house, wearing the most expensive clothes and other gratifications. Everyone wants to be right at the top there in term of worldliness. Owning things becomes too important for most of us. We gauge ourselves by our money and what we can buy. I do understand that what is acceptable in one community may not be acceptable in another and I see nothing wrong with wanting nice thing and enjoying life because that is how God intended to be for us. Nobody wants to struggle with poverty or hardship. The problem arises when we idolize and get obsessed with these things, losing our consciousness on the fact that we should be focusing on what we really just need. We all want to be more excelling than the next person so we lose focus on life’s simplicity. Therefore, these things can become an anathema rather than a blessing and we can now understand the animosity that causes people to go into atrocity. People find themselves experiencing astounding feelings due to someone else owning or possessing enticing items that they do not. For example, your next door neighbor just bought Bang & Olufsen — a 3D TV you’ve been obsessed with for months now but you are out of financial means. Emotional pain, self-worthlessness and self-doubt set in. That's what envy is. Envy may negatively influence the closeness and satisfaction of relationships. Amish way of life can be a valuable epitome in restoring family morals, our relationship with our neighbor, and our desire for having strong work philosophies. Their high value on patience, self-control, peace of mind and rejection to pride, conceit and egotism are worth emulating. As I sat watching the finality of the movie, I ponder how little we really need to be happy. I realized that the pursuit for material things has made more people unhappy that happy. Material things can keep people focused only on their self interest rather than on how they can benefit others. I realized too that the key to a happy life is the pursuit for simple pleasure which in today’s day and age is an act of fortitude. It may not thrill our neighbor or the people who knows us but it will make your family feel happier. Indulgence and materialism actually ends up limiting our freedom because we dedicate most of our time and momentum to get hold of them and engrossed ourselves in many negative exploits for its sake. Simple living is satisfaction on what we need rather than what we want. Simple living is living intentionally with freedom, faith and integrity.

THE GREATEST LESSON FOR THE GREATEST LOVE OF ALL

One morning in April 2003, I was given a gift that would change my life evermore. On my way to work I came off with multitude of people scampering and scrambling across the road. I looked around and saw houses enveloped by massive black smoke cleaved by intermittent blaze of flames. For a second, I gaped at the fire trying to take the actuality of the scene. I boarded out the vehicle to make my way through the crowd. I watched as people tried to retrieve pieces of anything that could be saved. I was looking in, contemplating and completely powerless to help. Some were just crying, watching the fruits of their handwork vanished before their eyes. I left the place when I saw firemen retrieved the bodies of two kids charred to death. This scenario taught me some important lessons in life. In an instant, everything can disappear forever. Your love ones can leave you without a final word. All the material things that we thought that are so important can be meaningless and worthless in a matter of seconds.

When I arrived at the office, that blazing scenario and the burnt bodies flashed back in my mind. This cataclysm forced me to take a closer look how I was living my life. My thoughts immediately turned to the people in my life, my kids, my wife. I realized a fire is like any natural calamity (just like Ondoy and Sendong) – it puts you in touch with how quickly life can change and how priceless every moment is. My perception changed and found myself asking some questions. Am I really happy? My work was exasperating. Hours were long and hard. My life felt like one lofty workday after another with very little else in between. I was so dissipated with getting the work done, delighting other people and keeping the boss elated that I never raised my head up from my drawing board enough to see what I was doing to my life. When I get home, I am enervated and just passed out on the couch and the next day it just begins all over again. Most evenings I barely got a good night sleep thinking how I would finish all the projects. I usually found myself overreacting to the slightest mistakes made by my kids and unapproachable when my wife asks me something. Vacations have become rejuvenation periods instead of leisure and recreation with my family. That burning houses became an analogy to me - I was misspending the precious time I had on this planet. I needed to slow down, take a truthful look at my life and what I really wanted. I was starting to see everything, all my time, spirit and vigor was being spent on the needs of others in the expense of my own needs.

The reality is, when I ask myself what I’d do if I lose my job it frightens me to death that I really don’t have the answer. Clearly I realized that a stable job or a prestigious position does not necessarily bring happiness. Instead, it brings a lot of accountability and high level of stress which at times leave your feeling depleted and out of touch with what’s really important in your life. Such feeling can be the reason why I kept myself alone and assiduous. I am so buried with work that I forgot that I have needs too, that my family needs my time. I have lost contact with myself and with those I love. When you are exhausted at the end of the day, fed up with working long hours, never feeling caught up, acknowledged or pleased you simply do not have the zest to spend on yourself or play with your kids or watch TV with your wife. Sometimes it feels beyond the bounds of possibilities to focus on your life when a tough and grievous job is taking up all your time and energy. This is when it’s critical to remember that you are in charge of your life. I am certain and convinced that our fears and discomforts coward us to make the choice for ourselves. Most of us think losing ones job would lead to a lot of psychological and budgetary changes or even trauma. I got caught up with this mentality and I forgot that I am the one running my own show. I forgot to believe in myself, my soul, that my actions are the seeds that grow into destiny .Such dogma take its price and I forgot to believe in myself. I should hear the wisdom of my soul and take action and I should find myself in the path that always leads to my highest good. It really does not matter how much money we have made, the successful careers we have, the education, recognition and all the accolades bequeath to us. Life is too short and our lives are truly made richer by the relationships that we share with each other.

The fire scenario became a metaphor to me. It enables me to realize that the most important part of my life is me. Learning to say No unless it is an absolute YES. A high quality life starts with a high quality me by giving myself the permission to make the quality of my life my top priority. This means putting myself above anything else, choosing to spend my time and energy on things that really brings joy to me and to my family and making decisions based on what is right instead of what just others want me to do. To truly love and respect one self would be the best choice to start a strong foundation of a rich and fulfilling life. Making a decision to change our life starts by making personal choice. Sometimes we have to trade in those unsupportive relationships, criticisms, and those people who put you down for more life enhancing ones and to have a more dignified persona. Honoring ourselves is the greatest gift we can give to our family and to anyone else to end up becoming a better father, mother, husband, wife, and friend.