WHAT WOMEN DON'T KNOW WILL NEVER HURT THEM

This doesn't have to be an obligatory action for husbands who go out like fire when unattended but rather an option to make up for oneself and save a relationship. I believe most women would rather prefer not to know the perfidy of their husbands than to know openly the agonizing truth. Women differ how to handle pain when offended. Some can easily forgive and forget, some can forgive but cant forget and others cannot both at all.So I would rather say this phrase is applicable on case to case basis. Revealing one's infidelity has its own setback. Truth, it can even leave a lasting scar in memory as well as in the heart of the one offended. One wrong just not justify by simply revealing it. It is a stark reality when us husbands cheated our wives and our conscience started to get up against us, we seem to unpack the burden of our guilty conscience by simply divulging our transgressions. Why cannot we keep it all by ourselves? Why us men did not think the consequences of our cheating in the first place? Is this fair for a betrayed wife the fact that she was the one done with injustice yet she ends up suffering all the pain of injustice? Our conscience means more than all the revelations we will make, my point is --- if we can lie to betray women why cannot we do the same not to hurt them but instead make an honest, sincere, silent atonement? Sometimes not everything that a man permitted to be told is an upright and heartfelt disclosure of mistakes because infidelity is just addictive. Some of us admit our sin because we fear our reputation more than our conscience and morality. Most often men obstinately regard their betrayal not as an unjustifiable, unpardonable self-centered choice, but rather as understandable mistakes. Once forgiven we are back on our business again. There are some of us who reveal too much, but prove nothing at all. Blessed are the men who have nothing to say and abstain from giving admission of his guilt but rather act in silent repentance. I strongly believe that he who honestly repents . . . repents no witness nor listener (God is more than enough) A true and honest remorse is just good enough to appease a guilty conscience. It is true that marriage is a relationship between two forgiving partners. Though forgiveness always come in an unbounded supply, but sometimes the pain we inflicted makes it hard to find while the wound of infidelity is still fresh. Women wont forgive unless they have believed. . unless they have understood. Husbands repent and sin no more examine the past, rebuild the present, plan the future. Wives, forgive to forget and pick up every shattered fragments of your life to start a new one. Husbands and wives , kill the sin and love the sinner.

"Repentance for silence is better than repentance for speaking"

MY HUSBAND'S WOMAN

After the day's frantic chores and routines Eva and I would savor and relish our bonding moment in the living room watching our favorite evening Koreanovela, My Husband's Woman. The story goes like this:

Cassandra Lee (Kim Hee Ae) returns to Korea after her Korean-American husband committed suicide due to business failure and deep depression. With the help of her bestfriend Jissele Kim (Bae Jung Ok) ,Cassandra starts her new life. She then meets Jerry Hong (Kim Sang Jung) Jissel's husband and falls deeply in love with him. Cassandra who has pragmatic, logical disposition even moves into the same community as the couple to be closer to him. Jissel, however did not know at first that her husband is having an affair with her best friend until only her sister Rosario (Ha Yoo Mi) discovered them kissing in the kitchen while everyone was outside in a barbecue party. Rosario told the two to keep the affair secret; for she was afraid her feeble sister will die once she gets wind of the affair. Cassandra decided to tell Jissel her illicit affair with her husband to stop Rosario's beating of her. Jissel who suffers from her own personal pressures to be a perfect wife and helps her husband become successful in his life and career turns her emotions into anger and hatred when she learns of the betrayal of her husband and good friend. The drama unfurls at this point in their lives…

This is a story of infidelity and repentance, hatred and forgiveness. Some men considered infidelity in women as a mannish attribute and some even believed that those men who love once or have a single affair in their lives are shallow people. It is a bare certainty when honeymoon has come to an end accompanying perhaps the commencement of restraints of parentage - the festival of love will grow sour and the love of wine will lose its bunch resulting in a less amorous and cold marriage. Sexually speaking, men and women respond differently in their sexual experience. Wives respond to sex more in terms of relationship, of affection and sharing than do men. Their sexual submission is far more directed precisely to their husbands, possibly at the hope for a child. A woman believes sexual union to bring her closer to her husband and to remain more intimate to him ever after. Most men respond to sex according to the craving of their sexual rhythms. Men are basically more artistic and experimental than women when it comes to love making. They have domineering behavior in bed. When wives unable to learn and respond to their husband's specific sexual rhythms men tend to look it to someone else who can satisfy his carnal desires and sexual tempos. Sex has its own heartbreak and 7th heaven. Realization of marriage may pivot on acceptance of our partner's total person. Husbands can make sex affectionate, tender and exciting by simply not doing sex for the sake of lust but for the purpose of their wives. Spouses should both learn how often, how intense, how slow, how fast, what gives delights and what offends. Husbands should learn to read the sexual languages of their wives' heart and soul, and in return wives should learn to read their husband's. When a man becomes an adulterer we obstinately regard our inter personal disappointments not as an unjustifiable, unpardonable self-centered choice, but rather as understandable mistakes. True remorse only needs confession to experience forgiveness that is always there in an unbounded supply. Show humility where life not only begins but also where joyful growth continues... True forgiveness is to forget in order to heal ourselves from pain and hatred we never should have felt in the first place. When a man leaves his wife without valid reasons for a union with another woman, he is not only breaking God's Commandments but at the same time he is making a decision that will only fuel and blow up his personal failures.


"Therefore what God has joined together, let man not separate."
MAR 10:9