Thursday, March 12, 2009

HOW HONEST SHOULD WE BE?


My grade school classmate Edwin. has his Friendster shoutout like this: “Honesty does not always bring a response of love, but it is absolutely essential to it”This is very true , but how could love be expressed through honesty if we neglect our obligation to spare someone’s feelings? How could honesty express concern if we only think of ourselves? How someone could have the faith if somebody has raw honesty? I have heard a story about a man who admits to his loved one how he had wronged her. The man has been deceiving his wife all his life and decided one day to change his ways. The man seemed sincerely moved about his judgment and began to confess his unfaithfulness. His wife was aghast with his revelation and they started not to speak. A week after revealing to his wife that he has often committed adultery over the years, his wife went under the care of a psychoanalyst at a mental hospital. As a result of this tactless honesty everything about his life collapsed. What can we take from this? Disclosing the truth may be healthy and most often will not harm anyone, but there are times a thoughtless honesty can be very devastating to a relationship. We must always remember that true honesty should not be delayed. It is just like an icicle; once it thaws that is the end of it. It becomes an old sin. Confession of old sins may free the burden of guilty conscience and may bring a self-upright feeling but it is comparable to throwing up on someone. It may make the confessor feels good but it does not do much for the recipient, it hurts to the bone. It is often times like a painkiller that gives a temporary sedation than a solution. Sometimes honesty can be very self-centered thing, some people use honesty as a way to thump people under the outfit of a good person. I believe one should have to confess to God before anyone else and makes recompenses to the hurt party. A person has all the rights to be honest about his belief and intentions but he must not disregard his responsibilities not to offend anyone .It is not reasonable to liberate ones self just to get the load off the chest. Hardly ever ,people would think that lying is the best for any situation but clearly I realized that both telling a lie, and the truth has what it takes of causing harm. I also realized that honesty is not the highest value in the Christian life. It is not the best policy either. People may argue me about this but the highest values for me are love, faith, concern and the best policy is integrity. On my personal interpretation honesty and integrity have key distinctions. Look what is happening to our politics now, everyone seems to have a piece of truth to say because of self interest and greed. This could happen to any sort of situation or relationship. How can honesty be admirable and commendable if we are not willing to gamble harm to ourselves? Sometimes the reason why people want to tell what they know is exactly to loosen their pain and shift onto somebody else or to attain their selfish motives. Integrity saves the feelings of others by counseling our secrets. It is conviction of a true honest man of what is right and wrong. Integrity is an unselfish virtue... There is evidently always a time to keep silent and say nothing. Even Jesus Christ at one point did not say to his 12 disciples the truths that were beyond their comprehensions. Jesus could have answered the truth to all the charges against him but he kept still and to Pilate’s astonishment He just said . . .”no more”
The effort to say the unembellished truth sometimes boomerang and may lead to a rocky path to a weakened or worst scenario - broken relationship. Though I believe that honesty does not glorify sin nor justify it, it is sometimes the cruelest game. You hurt someone as you seem to feel self righteous about at the same time. How honest should we be?


Confess your sins to the Lord and you will be forgiven, confess them to man and you will be laughed at.

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